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2 yo this morning found a shirt with a shark on it and some fish running away. He has been interested in relationships, especially calling an adult version of an animal "mummy" and a baby version "baby". Today he insists on pointing at the shark and saying "mummy" then at the fish and saying "baby" no matter how much I say they are different animals
I am glad the mommy is just chasing her babies to keep them safe

Seriously considering the pros of creating inclusive happy cereal that doesn't have a history of abuse

Content warning: depression

I feel like I disengage with all forms of connection when I am doing this badly. It's just really hard to reach out and put the energy into caring about others (outside of avery limited number of people). Usually I thrive on putting that kind of energy out there, but now it's hard. I'll go weeks without wanting to open up (I mean, what is there to say even?)... I've been like this for a long time, but I'm also wondering about what is actually a healthy and productive way of coping. Is cutting social connection out like that a good way to cope, as long as I still keep a few people in? It's a lot harder to have a perspective on what is okay when it's happening to you. I mean, all that said, I ultimately don't want anyone to worry about me either - it'll all be different in May anyway, just holding onto that future...
We slept *so much* when we had a newbor
But newborn and toddler is gonna be a thing
Fair.. only time will tell, but at least it won't be the current predicament

Okay, every time I try to make a content warning I fail.... is there a wiki I can reference so that I don't keep making these kinds of mistakes
There are several ways for you to collapse incoming posts based on addons. By language (you can list the ones you read), by keyword, or even by arbitrary rules through an advanced logic parser with the Advanced Content Filter.
I shouls enable a bunch of addons for Becky...

It's certainly strange to be a part of such collective emotional struggling. I start messages with "hope you're okay" instead of "how are you?" to remove the obligation to answer in the question (probably by lying, bc who actually is okay?).. at least with a statement ppl can avoid it if they want to. I've also always seen mental health struggles as very valid bc of my own struggles being so nonsensical in cause... but not everyone does. I imagine it must be especially challenging for those who see it as invalid
I think it's important to remember that this is a public network, and as such people will behave differently than in private and the question "how are you?" is more challenging to answer in this context. So the "Hope you're okay" is doubly better in my opinion, by removing not only the pressure to answer, but more importantly the pressure to answer publicly which is a completely different ballgame.
Oh yeah, that definitely makes sense to me. I was mostly referencing society at large when I said collectively, although it is definitely more in my radar being on social media the ways in which you see people struggling. That said, I'm not sure it would've occured to me to post the question "how are you?" publicly. I've mostly changed my language there in text messages and DMs to friends... but definitely I agree it changes the expectation significantly to ask that question publicly

Did I just contribute to someone leaving the fediverse? 😞
Thanks for saying so, it was hard to tell what exactly happened
If you're talking about the same person I'm thinking about, they were being annoying and stubborn, listening only to themselves and being a nuisance overall. As a result, they were shown the door, and it is not your fault if they slammed it shut.

I have been a bit sad lately, so I haven't been on much, but mostly it's from getting a Mallory-Weiss tear (my secons this pregnancy) and then getting diagnosed with gestational diabetes shortly after which means I can't even enjoy the freshly squeezed orange juice I bought or ice cream. It's been a time, and now I'm on that cusp of not knowing if I'm sad or if it's a mild depression. I think figuring out these lines is honestly the hardest part about having bipolar 2, since I've had it my whole life. What is even normal human emotion?
Thanks, I'm sure it will get better in 9-11 weeks at least 😊

I love being creative in many ways, and I think since I never do it for anyone but myself, it's really easy to never feel any pressure to start or finish things.. I get to be creative on my schedule, and it's a huge reason my desire to be creative has only ever increased with time

Just learned that Alouette, Gentille Alouette is about preparing a lark for cooking and as a vegetarian, I have to ask if this is really an appropriate song to sing to children..... this is what I get for not learning enough French in school

Ya'll I got the best Valentine's day gift ever from @silverwizard who commissioned a song from The Dollyrots based on Because I'm Awesome called Because Becky's Awesome 😍😍😍🥰🥰🥰

My only interaction with people on here thus far has been tangential to the small number of people I follow - but! @silverwizard has kindly introduced me to some communities in which I may be able to follow some more people. Very excited for this development, despite the fact that I'm very happy with who I follow (just would like to.... interact more)

I'm using the fedilab app, bc I mostly only use my phone unless I'm doing something specific... But realizing it's difficult to read the reply threads on it (who is replying to whom)
Thank you both for the suggestions and input... I just downloaded an app called webapps, which connects you to saved websites with a click, and while I don't think it was what @Hypolite Petovan was originally suggesting, it is along that vein. I'm hoping it works well, but I'll keep experimenting anyway :). I appreciate both of your patience in explaining things to me.
It sounds like the same, the core principle of "Add to Home Screen" on iOS is that no browser controls (back, forward, refresh, tabs) show, freeing some screen real estate for the website itself.

Becky reshared this.

A very upsetting thread about casual #racism among educated people in Canada. Racism isn’t “somewhere else”, it doesn’t stem from a lack of education, it’s a culture.

Educated white people like me, check yourself.
Trigger Warning: Medical Racism

*Deep Breath* What does medical racism look like for a pregnant Black woman in Ottawa? Well so far...

3 people reshared this

Sorry, I apologise for missing some key words there.

You don't think it's possible to buck the culture when it's an important thing to ingrain in to our kids, knowing how hard it might be to fight in areas later in life?
It definitely a start, but it won't be enough on its own. Environments like medical schools are exclusive enough to have a culture of their own regardless of the general environment. This means that kids taught about institutionalized racism may end up reneging their teachings once inside one of these environments.
We really need to work from all angles, and to do that it needs to be recognized from within the home, within the cultural connections via education and outside home activities and from a governmental perspective. And it has to be a consistent awareness from all three at the same time :/.. I mean, absolutely be better, and demand better.
I think I'm a little more of an optimist if the kids have the right teachings under their belt - essentially to it being part of their character and having their wits about them enough to know when these problems exist.

I don't know what else we can do beyond start pushing government to get rid of for-profit education - or at least stop subsidizing institutions that are known to breed this sort of thing. That's a big ask, too.
We all do what we can, which is gonna look different for each person. I would like to be optimistic, but I definitely am hesitant there when I see the effects of social pressures and how it can really change a person. But, I would never say do more than you a capable of. If you have power and can use it, great. I do think teaching children to fight racism is incredibly important, but it's hard for me to see it being enough on it's own
School is a part of kid's characters, but only a part. The family environment and their own personal sensibility are the two other major parts. So whether such a teaching would stick with all the students is highly debatable. Still worth it, just not the end of it all in itself.

And I'm very much with you on stripping government support from for-profit education. I don't think a ban is in order because it is neither desirable nor realistically achievable, but I'm opposed to the current public support with either accreditation or direct funding.

There is nothing about my kid learning to say no that I'm not stoked about (he was already pretty good at saying yes)

Thinking I want to be a member of starfleet when I grow up would require me to desire to leave earth in a rocket on purpose. That sounds worse than a plane...
You seem to envision rockets, and not being born in space like many in Star Fleet
I suppose it is possible to be born in space, but if I was born in space, than I wouldn't have to cultural environment or the home environment to be me, and it's possible that I therefore wouldn't be afraid of heights in the same way ;)

Becky reshared this.

#uspol It isn't surprising coming from Republicans, but it goes to show that white supremacism is alive and well in the US even without Donald Trump. It never needed him to thrive in the first place.

Becky reshared this.
Google is just saying "We want to control Open Source"
Fuck 'em

So, I am reading a book called Saving Normal, which considers the expanding of mental illness categorization negatively and while that is a question and it is interesting to read about and I am happy to engage with the book.... I have some other thoughts about the perspective of the book
Which is complicated to me... it's perspective is protective of not having a mental illness, we are needing to "save" people from the pitfalls of being labeled as having a mental illness. And that isn't to say that I think everyone fits into having a mental illness, far from it, but just that maybe that perspective is problematic in some ways
There are certainly problems with being misdiagnosed, whether you are not mentally ill or simply have a different illness, and, like I said, I still want to engage with the books premise whether or not I agree with it. Just, I have mild problems with the perspective, it feels off to me..


If you have any good suggestions about who I should follow (especially if they talk about mental health, and definitely especially if they have too many followers to easily follow me back) so that I can have a more active page, that would be greatly appreciated 😊
@Hypolite Petovan
I was also, to a degree, gonna try to keep twitter and friendica separate. I have good friends there but it's exhausting content with little engagement in nuance, and really nuance is a place I thrive. I still think it has a place for me to engage, but probably more passively. I might also be imagining too perfect of a universe in my head tho, I really am too new to get a good grasp on that.
Fair enough, I do understand the lack of activity issue and following Twitter accounts from Friendica is a way to increase your feed's activity without being impacted by collateral content.

I'm thinking about a post @silverwizard showed me a while ago about how friendica and mastodon are somehow not actually an example of a non-single source (I don't remember the exact phrase) open community-regulated social media and now that I have tipped my feet in, it makes even less sense to me how that could possibly be the case...
I ended up finding your "discussion" with them and, huh, I didn't get anything from it.

- Centralized instance is WRONG, self-hosting is HARD!
- Then what?
- Read my first sentence again, ha ha ha! *disappear in a puff of smoke*
Yeah, I really tried to engage, and got... nothing.

I unfollowed, moved on, and, bitched to some friends (including my wife) about how this person was frustrating.

So... if anyone knows how to create a beautiful background image in settings for their friendica account, please let me know. I just commissioned some beautiful art that I would absolutely love to display (and credit, for she is an amazing artist, and everyone should look for work)... but I am still new, and still learning and @silverwizard doesn't seem to care about having a super customized appearance to his page/profile (which is ev (expected value) from him)
Thank you so much! I've finally gotten around to doing this (I don't go on my laptop much) and I appreciate the information
You're very welcome!

#introduction #newhere

Hi, I'm Becky... you'll see me post about mental health, especially bipolar (which I have, but study, and am working on a podcast for), childcare (as I'm currently monitoring my 1.5 year old), and probably a little politics. Those will probably be my main things, but don't be surprised if I pop up randomly

So @silverwizard was listening to a YouTube video this morning that had Mike Cernovich talking about memory, which I having been thinking about all day.

Mostly bc memory is *reconstructive*, which is very different from *false*. And in particular, I think it's really important to keep in mind that it is more likely to follow certain narratives only for really cogent socially important events...
What that actually means is, for the attack of 9/11, you may incorrectly remember certain details bc you have a social narrative of what you should remember... Also, reconstructive means you re-remember things by recreating it in your mind each time, that doesn't make it wholly inaccurate tho...
Moreover, false memory is a thing that means something specific....

Also, please bear with me as I figure out controls

I logged on to friendica for the first time, and, terrifyingly, was already met with not one, but *two* followers. I hope this will not turn into a scary version of twitter, where I already have a terrifying 60 followers...... After like only 1 year or so....
It's all good, just was a shock to my timid self lol, although I must warn you, you are not likely to get grumpy sysadmin rants from me, more like mental health and childcare rants
What a coincidence, both are also relatable concerns of mine!